AUREVOIR ET MERCI PAPA

I WAS 12 AND IT WAS MY FIRST COMMUNION.

MAYBE THE MOST DIFFICULT POST I EVER HAVE TO  WRITE BUT I THINK I NEED TO . 

YES I AM BACK FROM HOLIDAY .........WELL HELL-LIDAY BECAUSE AS SOON I ARRIVED IN YAOUNDE THE 21 ST AUGUST MY DAD DIED THE 25 TH AT HOME IN MY ARMS. 

I WAS PLANNING PROPER VACATION/EXCURSION  AND EVERYTHING BUT I HAD TO STOP AND ONLY CONCENTRATE ON THE PREPARATIONS OF HIS FUNERAL.
IT WASN'T EASY BECAUSE I WANTED TO DO THINGS SIMPLY BUT IN AFRICA YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW SOME TRADITIONS AND DARE TO AVOID THEM YOU WILL BE IN A VERY BIG TROUBLE.

BEFORE DYING I HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO TALK AND EAT WITH MY DAD. YES WE SHARE WITH MY SISTER HIS LAST MEAL THAT I COOKED. A LOT OF PEOPLE TOLD ME THAT THAT IT WAS A BENEDICTION. I DON'T KNOW BUT TO BE HONEST I JUST DON'T CARE. IT WASN'T SUPPOSE TO BE THAT WAY.

MY FATHER WOKE ME UP IN THE MORNING AND ASKED ME TO LET HIM SEAT ON A CHAIR DESPITE THE FACT THAT HE WAS SO WEAK, I JUST DID AND HE STARTED TO SNORE VERY LOUDLY DURING THAT TIME I WAS PRAYING AND SINGING. I WAS HOLDING HIM IN MY ARMS SO HE COULDN'T FALL OVER.

PAPA ET MAMAN  WITH  MY UNCLE AND AUNTIE.

MY MUM  KEPT SAYING TO ME  ; "LOOK AT HIM HE IS LEAVING US, CAN'T YOU SEE?"..... NO I COULDN'T SEE BECAUSE I DID NOT WANT TO SEE.... SIMPLE.
AFTER ONE HOUR AND HALF THE SNORING BECAME LESS AND LESS LOUDER SO I DECIDED TO MOVE HIM NEXT TO THE WINDOW SO WE CAN AT LEAST SHAVE HIM, A REQUEST FROM MY MUM.

 I HOLD HIS HEAD  WHILE ONE OF MY MALE  COUSIN SHAVED HIM. WHEN HE FINISHED I REALISED THAT MY DAD WASN'T MAKING ANY NOISE WITH HIS MOUTH AND SEEMED TO BE JUST SLEEPY. THEN I KNOW THAT HE WAS DEFINITIVELY DEAD. HE DIED IN HIS SLEEP VERY PEACEFULLY.

I COULD HAVE WROTE ABOUT HIM A LONG TIME AGO ( I THINK I DID ) BUT TO BE HONEST WHY?  PLUS MY DAD STIPULATED THAT WHEN HE DIED HE  DIDN'T WANT ANY TESTIMONY ABOUT HIM.

HIS PHILOSOPHY WAS THAT HE YOU WANT TO SAY SOMETHING BAD OR GOOD SAY IT WHEN THE PERSON IS ALIVE. THAT'S WHY HIS FUNERAL WAS A HUGE PARTY WHEN I  WILL RECEIVE THE VIDEO I WILL TRY TO POST THEM.

THE DAY BEFORE HE DIED WE WERE 4 PEOPLE IN MY PARENTS BEDROOM, MY DAD,  MY MUM, MY SISTER AND ME. I TOLD THEM HOW IT WAS STRANGE THAT WE WERE THE FOURTH OF THE FAMILY TO CAME IN FRANCE AND BORN IN CAMEROON.
YES, IN FACT MY DAD CAME FIRST IN FEBRUARY 1971 AND WE FOLLOWED MY SISTER AND ME (  WE WERE 2 AND 1 YEARS OLD ) WITH MUMMY A YEAR LATER. SO OUR FAMILY STARTED WE US IN FRANCE. AND THE LAST NIGHT DADDY WAS AGAIN WITH US.
  IT 'S LIKE CLOSING ONE  CIRCLE OF  OUR  FAMILY LIFE I THINK.

MY PARENTS AND THEIR 3 DAUGHTERS AND 7 SONS WE WERE ALL AT HIS FUNERAL IN CAMEROON. THEY HAD TO COME URGENTLY. I THINK HE WAS HAPPY BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT HE ASKED IN HIS WILL THAT WE MUST ALL BE THERE.

HE WAS 70 YEARS OLD AND DIABETIC FOR 45 YEARS , THE LAST 7 YEARS WERE VERY PAINFUL FOR HIM. HE ALWAYS TOLD US THAT HE WANTED TO GO, SO IT'S  QUITE UNDERSTANDABLE BUT IT HURTS SO BAD, SO SO BAD.

AUREVOIR ET MERCI PAPA.